Alone and lonely

I treasure my time alone
Yet,I am miserable by myself
I would be enjoying some company
If it would be the kind that I like
How I hate it when that missing feeling emerges
Because I remember all the good times
However to compromise myself and principles
I would choose to face the lonliness
How I dislike the challenge
To ponder on options and choices
The energy used zaps me
And I remain muddled
I convince myself that it is for my benefit
To sit hear and lavish the time alone
Yet, I really don't want to be by myself at all
In defiance would I gather myself and wage
A warfare on silence and lonliness
Only to learn, I have gained nothing
I must then sit alone to ponder
The effects of irrational behaviour
The coming back to settle on one self
Sitting alone and yearning
A whole more than zero.

LorraineNur

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